Monday Miscellany: You and I, just ants
Notes from June 1 - 7
Warm greetings1 from the front porch, where I’ve once again posted up for the day! It’s blessedly breezy, and while I do my thinking, I get to zone out on the cardinals and robins flitting from tree to tree.
Demolition inside the house is finished for now, and as the walls and ceiling in the office and dining room sit with their rotted innards bared, we’re at a decision point about how to move forward with reconstruction. Every option is double-digit thousands expensive. The end, when work is done and our living space is back to normal, feels far away and I’ll confess to being a little overwhelmed at the moment. But we will figure it out and we will make it through. Zippered plastic doorways and plywood floors are! not! forever!
(That said, it feels like a relevant time to ask—if you enjoy my book recommendations and general tomfoolery every week, would you consider a paid subscription? From now until July 8, I’m offering $1 off per month for your first year.)
The week in books
It’s a true bummer that life circumstances prevented me from attending my book club meeting on Wednesday,2 because Yesteryear by Caro Claire Burke is something that absolutely demands to be discussed. As you might already know,3 it’s the story of Natalie Heller Mills, a trad wife influencer on Instagram who suddenly finds herself in an actual homesteading situation and has to figure out how to survive without the modern conveniences she’s accustomed to. I was intrigued by this premise, if a little hesitant to engage—social media feels exhausting most of the time these days, and if reading is the hobby I do to relax and ground myself, I don’t love the idea of conservative influencers invading that headspace. But it started off strong and drew me in pretty quickly, and though the middle dragged a bit, I was back in for the reveal at the end.
It’s been a few days since I finished this one, but I’m still trying to untangle my feelings about it. Popular advice for writing book reviews recommends evaluating how well the author achieved their goals, but the problem is that I’m not exactly sure what Burke was trying to do here. Was she hoping to portray the negative effects of the influencer lifestyle on adults who choose this path, or on the children that they feature in their content? If so, yeah, check and check. Was she trying to show how the (white, Christian) patriarchy harms (white, Christian) women and forces them to make strategic choices in order to stay alive and get ahead in the world? Because there’s that, too.
And there’s also secret substance abuse, spousal abuse, child abuse, mental illness, the co-mingling of Christian idealogy and political power, the impossibility of actually living out an off-the-grid life, the ways women judge each other, the literal and metaphorical invisibility of household help, the unreasonable demands placed on mothers and wives, the line between protecting from danger and withholding crucial information and experiences, the harmful effects of comparison, how easy it is to manipulate the version of ourselves we show to the word, and so much more.
So ultimately, I guess don’t completely know what I thought of it!
The reading experience is gripping and gossipy; Yesteryear is certainly a page-turner. But the more I think about it, the more depressing it gets. Have you read this one? If so, let’s talk!
Right now and upcoming
I’m currently in the middle of a new release that I impulsively checked out from the library on a recent visit, set in late-70s and early-80s Paris and perfect for summer. After that, I’ll probably pick up another nonfiction about ADHD (oops, I went down a rabbit hole and placed a bunch of holds on the same topic, classic) before it’s due.
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The week on screen
Lately I’ve been slowly making my way through a couple of shows I missed when they originally aired!
I started My So-Called Life (1994) so I could listen through Greta Johnsen’s recap discussions on Happy to Be Here. The vibes remind me of Felicity, which I did experience back in the early 2000s when it was A Thing, and it’s been so fun to alternate between episodes of the show and the podcast. I don’t understand the appeal of Jordan Catalano at all, but also I’m not fourteen!
Reading Lena Dunham’s memoir recently was what got me interested in Girls (2012). Parts of it are definitely cringy in hindsight, but I’m enjoying it for the most part. My favorite scene in the (season 1) episode I just watched features Shoshanna accidentally smoking crack at a party and sprinting through the streets of Bushwick trying to escape the person assigned to take care of her while she’s high. There is… so much I could unpack there, but I’m going to leave that for another day.
Haiku round-up
This poetic form, containing seventeen syllables in a five-seven-five pattern, originated in Japan and traditionally includes thematic reference to the seasons. Mine vary in topic, but I’ve been writing one each day since the beginning of 2024 as an exercise in structured creativity. Here are this week’s poems:
Monday, June 1
You and I, just ants searching for tasty crumbs, then alerting our friends
Tuesday, June 2
The urge to get up is, unfortunately, bested by two warm lap cats
Wednesday, June 3
They aren’t my color but fuck it, I’m buying these giant heart-shaped shades
Thursday, June 4
Creativity can manifest anywhere including salad
Friday, June 5
Step back, remember why you started doing this and what makes you stay
Saturday, June 6
To be spotted and recognized from a distance, greeted with a shout
Sunday, June 7
The realest ones will listen, empathize, advise, then feed you pizza
Until next time
As I’ve mentioned previously, one of the ways I’m coping with construction chaos at home is to be outside as much as possible. Recently that included writing last Monday’s newsletter on my strollway bench and spotting the beautiful red-shouldered hawk pictured above, who rested for a good several minutes on a branch overlooking the creek before being chased off by a persistent blue jay. And on Saturday we met up with extended family for a summer reunion, part of which Jordan and I spent on a rented paddle boat piloted by our 6-year-old nephew. My quads were really feeling it by the time we went home, but ultimately I have no regrets.
See you next week, and until then, I’m hoping to get stuck in this type of traffic jam.
♥︎ Emily
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Okay that’s putting it mildly. It’s straight up ninety degrees out here. Steaming hot, humid greetings!!
And, for that matter, finishing the book on time…
This book is EVERYWHERE right now.